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User blog:TurtleShroom/Impress My Revestor - Quick Musical Story
THE FOLLOWING IS A STORY. TURTLESHROOM PRODUCTIONS PROUDLY PRESENTS: IMPRESS MY REVESTOR! ---- As anyone can tell you, the Swiss Ninja family had issues with economics. Okay, that is an understatement. The Swiss family couldn't manage a lemonade stand profitably. How could they run a car company? In 2009, the Gaston Motors company fell to ruins. At the advice of the Executive Cabinet, and largely out of jealousy of Swiss Ninja, they gave him a serving of humble pie and bailed out his debt and bankrupt companies, in exchange for control of them. This led to the rise of Tsar MobileShroom I, and, of course, a nationalized car company. Swiss Ninja and family, though, needed more money to keep annexing new countries, at least until they could start harvesting their resources. A quick way out would be to get a third party to buy and privatize Gaston Motors, then help the family make profitable, weenie little hippie cars (as opposed to MS' 29 MPG so-darn-huge SUVs). The problem? That would be convincing MobileShroom to authorize the sign-over. It's not like a czar will just abdicate his crown. Swiss Ninja had a plan, though. ----- It is early in the evening. Swiss Ninja enters MobileShroom's igloo. Outside, the sound of tools and machinary are loud. Tsar MobileShroom wakes up, wearing his automobile-themed pajamas, and picks up his crown off the nightstand, placing it on his head. He walks outside to see Swiss Ninja with MobileShroom's old-timey car on a tow truck. MobileShroom: WHAT IN THE NAME OF CHRYSTLER ARE YOU DOING?! Swiss Ninja: I'm hauling off your old clunker and giving you... A luxury sportscar gracefully scoots onto the driveway. It is the kind of deluxe vehicle that makes adolescent creatures swoon. Swiss Ninja: This! MobileShroom glares. Swiss Ninja: .........if... if you act now, it will be yours! Just authorize the privitization of Gaston Motors and- MobileShroom: NO! Swiss Ninja: ...-but why?! MobileShroom: I LIKE my old car! Swiss Ninja: -but this car is every automobile enthusiast's dream! MobileShroom: Well, it's not mine! Now, give me back my car! I can't revoke your license or your hippie car, but I know folks who can! Swiss Ninja: Wait, wait, NO! MobileShroom turns around. MobileShroom: What now? Swiss Ninja hits a button on a boombox that he removed from his inventory. ---- Melody Just last year, my so gracious Czar, My land monopolized car, -but the Feds so despised me, With stock they did buy me, -just 'cause I didn't have the profits to run... So I coughed up my signage to escape the debt, -but they won't give back GM, making money I bet! Now I need your approval to make this move legal, So there's only one thing I can do! I must impress my revestor, To re-privatize! I must impress my revestor, Shrink government size! Simple privatization he will take from your nation, Gaston Motors goes where it shooouuuuulllldddd! I must impress my revestor to clear up my stress, 'Cause I am not a bankrupt-y and an ego-filled junky! Give my back my position before I get a conniption, O'er the company's investments I maimed! I must impress my revestor, I must impress my revestor, I must impress my revestor, Before I break the bank! ---- Swiss Ninja: So, can my family have Gaston Motors back? We won't drive it into spiralling debt again, we promise! MobileShroom: NO. MobileShroom slams the door. Swiss Ninja: Your SUVs pollute! Swiss storms off. Category:Music Category:stories Category:cars Category:Blog posts Category:songs